The Most Fun I've Ever Had
by Romancefan27764
Summary: A memory from the complex mind of Severus Snape. Enjoy! :


I remember that night like it was yesterday. I was in my fifth year at Hogwarts, and Dumbledore decided to throw a small dance for the students. I recall it being in early October, so everything in the Great Hall was decorated in a Halloween theme. I remember walking down the Slytherin staircase and scanning the crowd of Gryffindors for someone. Someone I love and miss very much. I couldn't find her at first. I was worried she wasn't coming, but then I saw that flaming red waves of hair before I saw her angelic face. Ah….. Lily.

She was chatting with a friend of hers. I nearly tripped going down the stairs in my hast to get to the Great Hall. Loud Irish music echoed throughout the entire room. I looked frantically to find her, but I couldn't see her anywhere. I slinked throughout the crowd, hoping to God that James hadn't cornered her. But when I saw Sirius, I had no time to look if she was there; Dumbledore just rose up to his podium. The entire Hall fell silent simultaneously. I remember his words exactly. They were brief but he seemed rather excited to get to the affair. "A night of frolic and fun awaits you students tonight. Enjoy!" With his final word, the band began to play once more. The crowd thinned a bit so I could continue my search. James wasn't with Lily. But as I turned around I saw her, standing right in front of me.

She positively took my breath away, as she always did. I remember what she looked like right down to the light in those dazzling eyes. She was wearing a blue sweater, with brown (rather tight) corduroy pants. Her red hair was pulled back, only framing that beautiful face. Oval shaped, with high cheekbones; there wasn't a blemish on her face, with rosy cheeks. Her thin, red lips pulled back in a small smile. (I smile now as I think of her.) Looking into her face was like looking into Heaven itself. Later in life I would realize how lucky James was. Just being with her was like being in Heaven. At least for me it was. The longing I had for her then and even still do was enough to bring me to my knees, but my self control was stronger. It had to be. I had been training myself for years.

"Hey Sev. You want to dance?" I was taken aback. I didn't think she would want to dance with me. We hadn't been getting along for awhile, because of those damn Death Eaters I had been hanging around. "Sure." I mutter in reply. "Great. I wonder why Dumbledore would hire an Irish band to play. I don't know, but it's really surprising that were even having this…." She was always the talker, but I didn't mind. I loved to hear her sweet voice talk about whatever. "Hang on. Let me go dance with this 1st year and I'll dance with you." She then floated away to a small blond boy, who looked positively delighted by her company. She took his arm and swung him around, while he nodded with a wide grin to a group of 1st year boys. They twirled, and kicked and laughed jumped around. I chuckled at the boy's wide eyes and long smile. She was so sweet that way, and so compassionate. How she would take time out of her dance to make a little boys day. I believe she knew him from somewhere. When the song ended, they laughed and she gave him a little hug.

"I'm going to dance with him for a while." She said, pointing to me. The boys little face fell into an envious look my way as she came over to me. "Oh don't be jealous, you're still my best boy." She said to him, and his face lifted again. "I think we need to get closer." She said, and her right arm went around my back, and she took my hand with her left. I wound my arm around the small of her back, and held her to me tightly. My heart began pounding. I had never been this close to her. Love is a funny thing, especially in my case. To most people, love is a mere emotion. But my love for her flowed through my veins like a potion that truly ensnared my every sense, my every thought, my every move. She was always on my mind. My heart beat for her, after all, it was hers. It had been since I saw her on the swings that day with her sister. Our lips were only an inch apart. I wanted so badly to kiss her. To let that immense love I had for her flow out of me to her with one motion. I wanted to whisper to her my feelings for her, and I wanted so much to hear the words "I love you too" come from her. I lived for her. I loved her.

How could she not even suspect that? I gave miniscule hints of my feelings every once in a while. How could she not notice when I would look at her longer than necessary, or how I would pick a little flower every now and then and weave it through her hair? She was very intelligent and observant too. I was surprised that she didn't notice. I believe that's why I was so upset when she died. I loved her, and I managed to mess every chance of her being mine by falling to deep into the dark arts, by calling her that awful word only a few months from then. I never had a chance. Also, knowing that she didn't live anymore hurt ten times worse. At least she was happy and alive, with a husband who loved her just as much as I did and a baby boy. At least was the one I couldn't be. I think that's the only thing I every liked about the git was that her made her happy. I caught James staring at us, his face turned dark, and he stormed away. I smiled in victory. We began to dance. Well, not really dance; mostly hop around in a circle. We hopped until we felt sharp pains in our lower stomachs. We even danced on one of the tables. I don't remember what dance it's called, no one does it anymore, but Lily and I danced on a table. I never found dancing much enjoyable, but then I did. Sometime during the affair I participated in an arm-wrestling match with Remus. To my utter shock (and every one else's) I beat him. For the first (and last) time, I won an arm-wrestling match. I was so happy. That night I believe I was happier than I had ever been. I never wanted it to end. I remember being the last to leave because Lily and I spent so much time talking. I remember walking her to the staircase and after a hug, watching her ascend gracefully up to her dormitory. She exists now, only in my memory. I will remember the feeling of us chest to chest, closer than ever, and hearing her musical laugh throughout the commotion. That was really the most fun I believe I've ever had, and I will never forget it. Never.


End file.
